RIP to those innocent blessed kids #connecticut
“You block your dream when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith.”
Walk in the (Country) Park
Posted on: June 21, 2012
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This post is going to be rather green, despite the editing of some photos (which chose not to show up), they remained green.
On another bright sunny day I took off to the Country Park with my camera handy in one hand and specs in the other. Not being the avid walker I should be this was indeed a rarity but I wasn’t to regret it.
A lovely colleague in the office often took off on long walks and I wondered what could be so amazing, the quietness and seclusion has its advantages during a busy day at the office!
The lake side is its full glory…
The pyramid is just about visible in the distance!
The spooky hidden lake! Wouldn’t want to fall in here!
And over the bridge-
My excellent photography skills in taking photos facing the Sun-
I didn’t venture to go all around the park which goes on for miles and boosts a Kite field, Centre and facility and fishing fishers (?), but there were an abundant number of dog walkers, lovers, and kids to do that for me!
On the way back, walking across the fields to avoid the 4 –legged animals, a fellow from a group commented rather loudly ‘’of course she’s not, she’s not even wet, she’s not Jesus she can’t walk on water. She’s got a bloody camera in her hands you idiot!!’’ Really, the uncivilisedness (see http://daffodilsanddishwater.wordpress.com/2012/05/24/the-uncivilizedness-of-15-items-or-less/) of some people!!
Next time I will take with me a Walking Stick, A Massive Book, and An Ark just to complicate matters further!
A quote to end this (boring!) blog –>
He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature. – Socrates
”Brown People”
Posted on: May 22, 2012
- In: Anger | faith | Money | psychology | religion | Rich
- 5 Comments
Today was a Good Normal Day in the Office. A Good Sunny One…until the end.
I was on the web listening to ‘Just a Minute’ [possibly the coolest thing online] with my headphones when I noticed two colleagues looking over at me from time to time. I wondered what that was about so I put the player on mute with my headphones still.
It turned out these two gentlemen were talking about the existence of ‘brown people’ in their society and ‘Oh do you know that she’s brown’ and so forth. I heard enough so I took my headphones off and the conversation ceased.
No surprise.
What I don’t understand is and what you probably don’t know is, in the 1960’s the government was giving out coupons and ‘pass tickets’ to the very same ‘brown people’. My dad happened to be one of them. A few years later he bought my mother and eldest brother and sister to join him. My Dad renounced his own Birthcountry to work for a country that couldn’t get its own people to do tough jobs.
My dad spent more than half his life, working in a brick factory, making bricks we live in today and grew half deaf in his later years and people can turn around and say to me ‘Oh your brown, you’re not welcome here’. Wow…
My mother has been in this country for the last thirty odd years, conforming to her identity of her faith and values and yet when she goes into town, people turn around like she’s consumed their breathing space. Well, if you must know, she wears that black sack and head thing cause its part of her identity and she’s comfortable in it. Not because he’s completely illiterate and taking all your benefits.
I assumed ‘we’ fought for the right to freedom in WW2, but hey, that must be just me.
My parents go to Bangladesh occasionally, and yet, do you know what? They are treated like strangers there. It is assumed (I suppose) they must be loaded, living in a mansion, eating ten times a day. How little they perceive…
I can’t even contemplate the long-liness they must have in their hearts, to feel that they have nowhere to feel and call 
home.
I, it must be said, enjoyed growing up here during my childhood (+teenage years). We have great shops, parks and living in the same house for the last 23 years, amazing house (even if it is cold, even in summer!). I loved that feeling of innocence and freedom and indeed humour (which isn’t evident in this post sadly- please see my other posts -end plug).
I finished my Upper School education and went off to University to study Law. I came back expecting the world to be my oyster. Except that was not the case… And no, I didn’t turn extremist and reading terrifying books to scare off the M16 !!
I looked and I observed.
I observed the emergence of the BNP (+ religion).
I observed the emergence of tyranny against colour.
And most of all I observed tyranny of people in this society. I cannot get a job I am more that capable of because I don’t look the part. Since we welcomed the residents of Eastern Europe, I was being sidelined because I was too quite, wore a headscarf and didn’t show my arms and legs, which is quite an attraction at the work place apparently. I am brown, and a proud Muslim but how in any way would that have affected the society I live in?
I am extremely tolerant and welcoming, though being a woman of few words might not come across that easy. Though is all this my own fault?
Why do we feel the need to only see and not observe? To only receive, and not give?
People talk about Immigration this and that, though is it any fault of my own? My Dad came here when the country needed him and yet they insist on making someone like me who was born and raised here, that’s ‘British’ feel so degraded?
Is my colour and faith worth that much to you?
Earlier today, a collegue I was helping out with some IT said to me ‘ Oh You’re so lovely, your wasted here!’ I would have loved to turn around and say ‘ No, I’m wasted to society here’.
Looking back, maybe I shouldn’t have listened in to that conversation, but, hey life does that to you.
I will end, as usual with a quote and what I mean I suppose in the end…
“Hating people because of their color is wrong. And it doesn’t matter which color does the hating. It’s just plain wrong.”
― Muhammad Ali
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Hello,
It’s not really a tale. it actually happened. I was a Really Bad Sales Assistant. I don’t like meeting new people, where do you look? At there face or their wallet, cause I really just wanted their money…
Never again..
Ep. 1-
A lady comes in with a lot of baby products. I assumed she was getting ready to have the baby. I was wrong. I had to change the topic pretty fast.
Lesson 1- Never assume a fat lady for a pregnant one. Trust me.
Ep. 2-
I was talking to a young girl and she had, like a really husky voice. The voice was almost about to go!! and I said ‘you must hate having to be here when you got a bad voice’
Bad Idea.
Turns out that’s the way she normally talks, she never spoke to me nicely again. Ops!
Lesson 2- Never comment on a person’s abnormality. Not the way to make friends.
Ep. 3
A lady came in with a really nice hairdo, and I said, Oh that’s a nice hairstyle. Her reply was that’s because ‘I’m a hairdresser’.
RUDE.
Lesson 3
Some people are horrible, just don’t bother them, Clearly something was missing in her life. Prick.
Ep.4
Why does every customer treat you like you don’t know any maths and are just plain rude when you help them? Sorry I went to school here I know how to add, the question is do you know what 4 + 5 =?? Instead I was forced to say. ‘Thank you and here is your £5.00 off voucher, have a nice day.’ NOT.
Lesson 4
I don’t want to say anything without sounding arrogant! 😉
Ep. 5
Never work at Boots Ltd. If you want the worst experience in your life go ahead but just don’t!!
Lesson 5
Avoid Boots as much as possible.
Okay I guess I’m not a genius at making friends straight off, but cut me some slack dudes!!
I really need some Psychology and Friends-
If our experience of friendship is changing in many countries – and we are increasingly likely to turn to friends rather than kin (and, indeed, to judge family by standards of behaviour expected of friends), then this is something that we need to take careful note of both in relation to education and to questions of welfare more broadly. We have a substantial amount of evidence to suggest that social support in the form of social contact and group membership has a very significant impact on our feelings of happiness, our health and our ability to handle difficult episodes in our lives (see the discussion of social capital). However, we do need to examine the quality and nature of the networks of which we may be a part and the attitudes and behaviours of our friends, peers and kin. It is an obvious, but sometimes overlooked, point in discussions of social capital, that if our peers and friends are engaged in activities that are detrimental to their well-being and health then it is makes it more difficult for us to break away from that behaviour. As Ray Pahl (2000: 148) has again commented, ‘It is not friendship per se that is important, but rather the trust, security, feelings of self-esteem and feelings of being loved for one’s own sake that flow from it’. Knowing that ‘significant others’ like us, respect us and can provide practical support is likely to make for a happier life.
It is also important to underline the extent to which economic, social and cultural context impacts upon the experience of friendship (and the ways in which friendships sustain the existing order).
[O]ur friends, in numerous ways, challenge our pretensions and evaluate our claims, all the while confirming our personal and structural identity. Through such validation of the self, the significance of friendship in binding the ‘bricks of social structure’ together can be readily recognized. So just as friendships take on characteristics of the cultural, economic and social settings in which they arise, equally those ties are consequential in helping sustain the order there is within those settings (Allen and Adams quoted in Pahl 2000: 10)
Friendship can be viewed as personal and freely entered into – but it is formed in particular social, economic and cultural circumstances and this has a very significant impact upon the people we meet, and our ability to engage in different activities. It is of profound social as well as individual significance. Through friendship we gain practical and emotional support, and an important contribution to our personal identities. Friendship also helps us to integrate us into the public realm and ‘act as a resource for managing some of the mundane and exceptional events’ that confront us in our lives (Allan 1996: 114).
Full article can be read here:
http://www.infed.org/biblio/friendship.htm
Time to end on a Quote (and pic):
Have a Nice Day!
A trip to Harrods…
Posted on: September 7, 2011
Hello again.
In the Weekend I went to Harrods. Although I have mixed feelings about the place I had the ingenious idea to post it here.
Hey I can…
It ‘s a blog.
It was a Sunday, and that means FREE parking, if you can find any….
Drove around in my Micra ( the only Micra in sight!!!) and after half an hour found a spot. Finally.
It was busy, but busy is good. and there were a massively mix of people there. Mostly loaded. But hey I’m no pickpocket 😉 Most were clearly arabs, amazing how the rich are very rich and the poor… I’m sure you heard it all before..and it was nice being in a place where you weren’t looked at because of what you were wearing.
Alot of staff was one thing that was noted by my group. How and why do they employ so much staff was a question asked. The answer was because they can afford it and the Harrods owner is very rich, overpricing the items and that helps in a big way.
Guess who owns Harrods? No not Al-Fayed, amazing how even though it was sold last year people forget. People- it was bought for 1.5 Billion pounds by a Qatari Family. Is Qatar trying to take over the World? Gimme some, I kinda need some money!
I really sillyly asked, Why has the Escalator entrance bit got so much Egyptian stuff, Hey, is the Al-Fayad family Egyptian?!
Time for a pic-
I didn’t know Diana’s Blingy Ring was there, and a wine glass in a little pyramid…What’s that about?!
Owned by Muslims, Yay can eat in here. Wishful thinking…Why would a store owned by Muslims not have Halal food? Asked them and they didn’t even know what I was on about. I forget where the billions of money goes. but hey, a little bit of courtesy goes a long way. Ended up having dry scones. Grrrr…
Couldn’t take photos of some stuff…annoying
Time to stop.
I should add, on my way to my car, saw an immense car.
History of the Store is here (cause I like research and things):
First opened its doors in 1849 and has prided itself on maintaining and providing a reputation for excellence and ensuring that nothing is too much trouble for the customers. The magnificent and colourful history and reputation of Harrods comes as much from its products and services as it does from the people the store has welcomed through its doors.
The founder of Harrods, Charles Henry Harrod first stepped into the business in 1834 when he set up a wholesale grocer in Stepney in London’s East End which specialised in tea. To escape the filth of the inner city, Harrod took over a small shop in the new district of Knightsbridge in 1849. This small shop was the original site of the current store.
Working from a single room with two assistants and a messenger boy, Harrod’s son Charles Digby built the business into a thriving store which sold medicines, perfume, stationery, fruit and vegetables. By 1880, Harrods had expanded to include the surrounding buildings and employed 100 staff members.
The initial boom of Harrods was curtailed in 1883 when the store burnt to the ground in early December. Despite the loss of his store, Charles Digby fulfilled all of his Christmas orders that year too, making a record profit. A new building rose in place of the old one and once rebuilt, was able to extend lines of credit to its customers, some of whom included Oscar Wilde.
Wow. Notttt… Feel the need to end on a Quote here:
Hello world!
Posted on: September 6, 2011
- In: Anger | Laptops | Lorries | psychology
- 2 Comments
Hello World.
I am quite sad to sit in front of my laptop all day. Oh well. It’s always done in one way or another. Which reminds me I need a new laptop. My poor Acer is setting slow in his old age and I could do with it speeding up. Or just getting really annoyed and screaming at it. I don’t scream actually, I can’t. But today I did. On my way to Stevenage in fact. Some SLOW BLOODY lorry driver decided to take his time on the road. Personally I think he did it on purpose, but that didn’t stop me getting angry.
Oh no.
How does one control there anger? Is it easier to keep it in or let it out.
I should add, I like psychology, no, LOVE it actually and I wonder what Freud made of it:
Freud on the Repression of Anger and Aggressive Instincts
Freud theorized that social pressures force one to repress our aggressive instincts. Over time this repression creates inner conflict until our repressed aggressive tendencies are given an opportunity to be expressed in the legalized violence of war. At that point, these instincts are as if “cut lose” and a person is able to fulfil their aggressive desires through war. If Freud is correct, there will always be a need for police and government military organizations to provide retaliatory capabilities as a deterrent to the expression of innate aggressive behaviour.
A counterargument to Freud’s belief is that deterrence to aggression can be provided through positive means. That is, rather than deterring by negative consequences such fines or imprisonment, the deterrence can be a cooperative symbiotic relationship, the benefits of which would be lost if the rules that sustain the cooperative relationship were violated. The more a society makes use of positive methods of deterrence, the less reliance there would have to be on police, jails, and military institutions.
Narcissistic Injury and Narcissistic Rage:
As defined by Sigmund Freud, narcissistic injury occurs when you take as a personal attack, an injury to a member of the group to which you belong. If someone attacks a member of your family, and you react as if it were an attack on yourself, you are experiencing narcissistic injury; and if, in your anger, you decide in return to attack a member of your aggressor’s family, (other than the person who was actually responsible for the original attack), you are engaging in a calculated form of “narcissistic rage” or what may be called narcissistic revenge. The group, to which you belong, however, can be much larger than your family. It can, for example, be defined by the race to which you belong, your nationality, or your religious sect
(http://www.bsu.edu/libraries/virtualpress/wolfe/word/sigmundfreud.pdf)
– Whatever that means, I’m confused now. Good idea to stop writing…Oh and stick up a confusing picture.
It's a Quote
asmachoudhury 